an article by Neosmith
Of course, having considered the issues of Takahashi’s writing, it is now time to discuss the work of Soraya Saga. Certainly, her contribution to Episode I was quite significant. It is common knowledge that she had written “….approximately half of the script for the Episode I” and developed a good deal of its characters, including Jr., Momo, Ziggy and everyone related to them. What is interesting though is that Saga displays a far greater aptitude when it comes to character development and narrative writing than her husband. While we can’t always be certain of what exactly she did and didn’t write, we can deduce from the available content of Episode I, which chapters of the game bear her distinct stylistic signature.
Let’s take a look at the Pleroma chapter to illustrate. Its opening sequence introduces the audience to Ziggurat 8/Ziggy, who is hired by the SOCE to rescue Momo, who’s been kidnapped by U-TIC and now is held captive at the Pleroma base. In exchange for completing this mission, Ziggy demands an operation that will remove his human memories (a plot point that unfortunately the sequels had forgotten).
This serves to provide us with a clear understanding of who Ziggurat 8 is, what goal he has to accomplish and what he stands to get from it. We don’t know exactly why Ziggy wants to become a complete machine just yet, but the chapter later gives more than enough suggestions that he is someone who lives with the pain of his former life and doesn’t want it anymore. Similarly, the brief scene between Margulis and Momo establishes Momo as a little Realian girl, who just wants to go home and see her mother again. So basically, this chapter in just a few scenes provides a better sense of its main characters, and what their arcs will be than the Woglinde chapter does in its entire running time.
Once Ziggy goes to Pleroma, the game actually follows the rules of a classic goal-oriented narrative, wherein having received a goal, the protagonist will undertake actions that will lead to the fulfillment of his goal. The unfolding of the narrative is connected to the protagonist’s needs and desires. His pursuit of his goal actually drives the story forward and at the end of it, he achieves his goal. In this case, every action Ziggy performs is a means to rescue Momo and by chapter’s conclusion Ziggy gets Momo out of Pleroma. As opposed to having a random progression of story as in the previous chapter, here we have a series of interconnected events that unfold as consequences of previous ones.
This endows everything that transpires here with a sense of purpose and makes it understandable and easy-to-follow for the audience. It allows the viewer to form a true emotional investment in Momo and Ziggy’s story. So then, we have a lot of evidence that the Pleroma chapter was predominantly written by Saga.
First, it provides a very simple set-up that introduces us to two brand new main characters, while immediately and clearly defining their personal stakes in the plot. Second, the chapter visibly places far less emphasis on world-building and terminology, while for the most part providing much simplicity and clarity in terms of where the story is going. This is in stark contrast to Hashi’s propensity for not really explaining his characters and typically forgoing story logic. But perhaps the most telling element is that with the exception of Margulis, the chapter focuses entirely on Saga’s characters.
All of this evidence leads me to conclude that Saga is in fact a superior writer to Takahashi in terms of actual storytelling. Sure, there are plenty of things I could complain about. Given just how important Momo is to the Federation, one might wonder just why of all the people in the Universe, the SOCE would hire Ziggy, who constitutes outdated technology and is less likely to succeed than the latest model Realians or human agents. Ziggy’s rescuing of Momo also comes off perhaps too easily, with all the lax security in Pleroma. And then there’s poor Margulis, whose behavior seems incongruent with his position as U-TIC’s commander. I refer here to the fact that Margulis succumbs to the idiot mentality that seems to run through a lot of Xenosaga characters towards chapter’s end.
His attack on Ziggy is just plain ludicrous. Not only does he risk incinerating Momo with his pyrokinesis, but he also doesn’t bother to lock down any ships or have an ambush of Soldiers waiting at the Landing Platform in case Ziggy manages to get past him to ensure Momo doesn’t leave the base. Considering that Momo is the most vital element of U-TIC’s schemes at this point in time, his behavior here defies common sense, though it does allow the player to engage him in a very cool boss fight. (The fact that there’s never any personal consequence for Margulis as a result of his failure to secure Momo is another issue. Logically, his superiors would have him executed or at least demoted and punished.) Then again, Margulis is a Takahashi character, so his behavior here seems quite in line with Hashi’s often illogical and incomprehensible character writing.
The SOCE scenes meanwhile are just far too long and suffer from a preponderance of uninteresting expository dialogue - characters tend to pour over story events at great length, especially with those tangents regarding Kevin and the Mizrahi Sciences Research Center, which are easy to forget, given that they have nothing to immediately do with the Momo/Ziggy story. Plus, the conversations pretty unsubtle and the on-the-nose. Juli has to spell out that Ziggy will become a complete machine through his transfer and Ziggy himself, for a reserved and reticent man/machine shares way too much about his past. Details, such as the one regarding Ziggy committing suicide and signing a contract without looking at the fine print are the kinds of details that one would want to keep hidden from the audience at least for a little while, but that’s ultimately a matter of personal preference.
There’s, however, a lack of conflict and energy to these scenes - exposition is a good visual writer’s worst enemy in fact and there’s far too much of it in the Pleroma chapter. It sounds artificial and unrealistic. Plus, its tediousness kills narrative momentum and halts actual story progression, bogging down the story’s pace in the process. (Then again, Xenosaga as a whole suffers from over-explaining certain points and not explaining more important fundamental ones.) And yet, what makes all these points more forgivable than the glaring flaws of Hashi’s writing is that Saga presents a very interesting, understandable and emotional story at the core of all this. Ziggy and Momo are far more relatable and at this point far easier to grasp than the likes of KOS-MOS and Shion. Then there’s of course Jr., who really deserves another whole column all to himself.